Archive for March 2013 | Monthly archive page

posted by on Adoption

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I have been trying for 2 weeks to sit down and tell the story of this trip I took to Uganda that led to us adopting these 2 kids. For some reason it’s been really hard for me to put the trip into words.

I think it’s because I feel like there is so much that happened in such a short period of time, and if I try to record it all it will be the longest blog post of all time (and who would want to read that? Unless of course you want to be able to say you read the longest blog post of all time).

On the other hand, if I nutshell it, I leave a lot of important stuff out. And I don’t want to leave out important stuff that God did.

So here we go. I’m just going to start telling the story, and when I get bored, or my kids’ show ends and they come flying at me or it gets too long, I’ll just stop and pick it up later, OK?

This all begins with Josh meeting with a guy in our church. He actually met with him to talk about something not at all adoption related. But he and his wife have adopted 5 children and Josh told him that we’d love to meet with them and pick their brains about adoption.

(What a gross phrase: pick their brains. ugh.)

So as they talked about adoption, he told Josh about this man in Uganda who runs and orphanage called Bethel House. He’s known this man for years. And he told Josh about all that was happening in Uganda they both got pretty excited about the idea of our church getting connected with this orphanage for those interested in adoption.

Josh was super pumped about all of this and he came home talking a million miles a minute about this orphanage and getting Four Oaks involved and maybe even adopting from Uganda ourselves one day. But not now.

See, we’d actually been pretty sure we wanted to try for another baby and talk about adoption after baby #3. And I don’t think that would have been wrong, but I know now that God had something better. And as we prayed and planned, he redirected us in His goodness.

A few days after this meeting, I pulled into the driveway after dropping R off at school and Josh was standing in the garage practically jumping up and down with excitement. And since I clearly don’t need much to get excited, I thought “Oooo, are we going on a date tonight??” Um, no. That was not why.

He had just received a call from this man he’d met with. His wife and daughter were going to take a trip to Uganda for a day and wanted to know if I’d like to join them.

I looked at Josh like he was crazy. He was like, “How could you not?!” And I was like, “Are you INSANE??”

I didn’t have a valid passport. It was three weeks a way. On the weekend I’d be traveling, Josh was preaching and then flying to Minneapolis for a conference. So he’d have to deal with the kids, prepare to preach, and get ready to go out of town while I galavanted around the world.

But somehow he convinced me that this was an incredible opportunity. That even if all I did was support these two women and learn about the orphanage this would be good.

So I expedited a passport and got my yellow fever immunization and some anti-malarial drugs and Josh’s amazing family offered to help and this was happening.

Three weeks later I was sitting at the airport by myself, waiting for the others to arrive. First of all, I was totally freaked out by sitting by by myself. No one was touching me or asking for snacks. Second, I kept thinking “Why am I doing this?”

Don’t get me wrong. I wasn’t having second thoughts. I knew it was a great opportunity. And while I am not a “led around by my feelings” sort of person, I did have a lot of peace about going. So did Josh. So did all of the people who were praying for me.

I just had a hard time imagining what would come of all of this.

I think God had me right where He wanted me.

posted by on Adoption

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I wanted to get a post up over the weekend while Josh was away on the Men’s Retreat but, well…Josh was away on the Men’s Retreat, so of course…

Charlotte got a nasty cold

Our heat temporarily malfunctioned (in the middle of an uncharacteristically cold March night in Florida)

I took on a bunch of random household projects, which I always do when Josh is gone

Oh, and the internet stopped working. So even if I had found the time, I wouldn’t have been able to write!

I tried to fix it (by which I mean that I unplugged the router, plugged it back in and then gave up when that didn’t work), and then went back to my random projects.

I don’t know what it is about Josh being gone that makes me feel like I need to suddenly go through and organize all of our old files or remove the shower doors in the upstairs bathroom. No, really, that’s what I did. See?

Image 1

I’m not much of a planner. I think things like “I’m bored. I think I’ll go remove the shower doors.” And then I go do it, without even changing out of my purple fuzzy slippers or removing the toys from the bathtub. Josh isn’t really either. I mean, we plan our lives as much as responsible adults need to in order to function (she said trying to convince herself), but we tend to just do things without a lot of deliberation.

So over the years as we’ve talked about adoption there was this part of me that thought, “There is so much research to do, so many decisions to make, and I’m afraid that it’s going to keep us from ever doing this.”

Do we use an agency or adopt independently? Do we adopt domestically or internationally? If internationally, what country? Girl or boy? What age? When do we adopt?

God knows what we need.

Within a matter of days:

Independent adoption
Girl or boy? How about both
2 and 4

I’m not saying all of those questions aren’t important. They are. And for some, most actually, the process of answering those questions is a long one. But, God answered those questions very quickly for us and we both believe it was a kindness on His part.

We had been talking about adoption again, considering the right time for it, when Josh got a call that put us on the fast track toward it, although we didn’t know that at the time.  A couple in our church with a heart for adoption made us an offer we couldn’t refuse.  She was going to Uganda in three weeks (three?!), for one day (one day?!) and wanted to know if I’d like to go with. We would stay one night, talk to Rashid (who runs an orphange) and visit that orphanage. Then we’d fly back. Crazy right?

For us that meant me leaving the Thursday before Josh had to preach, and getting back just hours after he’d already left for a conference. I’d travel for 4 days straight and then be alone with the girls while jet-lagged and exhausted, and Josh and I wouldn’t get to see each other for a week. Sounded kinda insane to me, yet we said yes almost immediately. Which is good because then I didn’t have time to talk myself out of it.

Going into the trip I thought a lot of things, but I didn’t think it would lead to adoption. At least not right away. Josh and I both saw this as an opportunity to create connections for our church in Uganda and open the door for many people to consider adopting there. We still pray that would be true! But we had only ever talked about adopting a baby, and I knew for a fact that all the kids at this orphanage were over 2 years old. So I had pretty much dismissed the possibility of our adopting, though I still prayed “Lord if you want us to adopt, show us.”

Oh how small my faith is. How big His plans are.

Obviously He did want us to adopt, and did show us, but I’ll save the story of my trip for my next post.